1) I admit I can’t controlThe life I have been living But a Higher Power exists To take my life in hand. Admitting I am helpless here, I look for strength to go on. As the universe unfolds, I learn to stand. CHORUS I’ve living every day now As though it was my first one I’m listening to the others…
I am waiting, I am waitingI’ve been patient and quiet and good Oh so patient: I’ve done everything that I should. I am waiting, I’m still waiting Getting madder and sadder and blue. Tired of waiting — I don’t want to stay and catch the flu. Maybe all I need is a helping hand Maybe all I need is my…
Our C-0-N-D-O-M-S come flavoured todayThere’s licorice, peppermint and beer New taste treats on the way! A condom’s now a standard thing Like shoes when out of doors Protecting you from what I’ve got Protecting me from yours 2) Those C-O-N-D-O-M-S I always have near at hand And you do too and thank you, Babe I know you understand It’s being…
Here’s our generic all-purpose protest song, And we can sing it whenever things go wrong. It’s got no purpose except to protest, So we sing it loud and sing it strong. We start by naming the current problem: Election fraud or profiling Muslims, Pre-emptive warfare for corporate profit… We just trot out this handy-dandy song. Torturing prisoners or global warming,…
We’re sixty and we’re sexyAt least that’s what we hear From programs seen on Tv And talk shows on the air Even magazines give coy advice With graphics that are not quite nice To tell us that at sixty We’re as sexy as can be! 2) We’re seventy and sensual Although it doesn’t show Geriatric experts say That we’re all…
What don’t you get when you use a condom?You won’t get AIDS or other diseases You’ll get to see who he really pleases Oooo true love wears a condom now He’ll always wear a condom now v2)What don’t you get when you use a condom? You’ll never have worries and doubts and testing That’s why we’re here and we’re suggesting…
Oh dear, what can the matter be?We’ve been attacked by the forces of gravity Fat has appeared where we once had concavity Nobody said life was fair. 2) Older men become more adorable Even though their figure’s deplorable Their physique is always insurable With or without their grey hair (Kazoo repeat of last line) 3) Older women are thought unattractive…
(Two at a time can take turns waltzing while the rest sing with condoms pinned on their hats) I’ve got you a condom I want you to wear it We don’t need a baby today The Creator has given Us good brains for using When our love gets us feeling, ‘that way.’ v2) A condom’s a blessing A little life…
Thanks for the mammogramIt wasn’t lots of fun It made my breast go numb Squash me any harder And I’d be a hot cross bun But thank you, so much. 2) Thanks for the mammogram It really helped to see The shady side of me The x-rays found what I could not As large as a small pea So thank…
(Should be done lighthearted and over the top – like the teachers out of the room)They’re latex and they’re rubber (Everyone hold one up and stretch it) They’ll help you like no other Don’t use them? What a nutter!! It’s condoms now for me (Addam’s family noises here) v2) They just aren’t controversial They don’t need a rehearsal Without them…
